Wishing



My third novel PUT A SPELL ON YOU is out today, and availiable to download from Amazon.

The story imagines what might happen if someone was granted several wishes but they all went wrong. (Just the kind of thing that would happen to me - them going wrong, that is.)

Here's a little taster from Chapter One to whet your appetite ...




Things I would wish for right now if I could wave a magic wand:

1) My boyfriend Will to stop being a born-again hippy and propose before I’m shrivelled to the point where no other man will look at me.
2) To find the perfect location to film Sibling Rivalry before I get fired. (Preferably one that doesn’t involve the owner changing his mind at the last minute and chasing me off his property, brandishing a shotgun).
3) Lara’s baby to stop bawling 24/7 so she can get some sleep and go back to being my lovable best friend instead of a slitty-eyed wreck in ill-fitting clothes.
4) Mum’s boyfriend, Del – a pervy, tattooed trucker from Letchworth – to disappear.
5) Glossy, flame-red hair instead of my cowpat-brown frizz. And to be a cup size bigger. With dainty fingers. And a smaller bum. (And to be less shallow.)

My twenty-seventh birthday started much like any other day, except that I was cross with Will.
‘You didn’t even buy me a card!’
‘I made you one, Josie. It’s more meaningful. Anyone can go to a shop and buy one.’
He spoke softly and without reproach, because that’s how Will speaks these days.
He did look hurt though – his hazel eyes sort of bruised – but I was so disappointed I pretended not to notice. ‘You stuck some dried bits of pasta to a piece of card cut from a Bran Flakes box.’ I waggled it at him. ‘I made a better fist of this sort of thing when I was six.’
‘I’ve spelt out your name in a love heart,’ he pointed out, reasonably. ‘You’ve got to admit that’s romantic.’
‘But some of the bits have dropped off. It says “Joie”.’
‘That’s because you keep waving it about.’
I wondered whether to mention I’d been secretly hoping for an iPad and possibly a trip to Venice, but decided against it.
‘I’ve made you a commitment bracelet,’ he said, clearly deciding not to acknowledge his blunder. He pushed back his wavy brown hair, hoicked up his boxers, and loped across to the dressing table with puppyish eagerness.
Will never used to lope or have floppy hair, or be puppyish. Before he was coaxed into a trip to the Shambalaya – a spiritual retreat in Kent – by his brother Ben (or Moonfox as he insisted on being called) he’d worked in advertising and was being tipped for big things.

He wouldn’t have been seen dead in tie-dye T-shirts and frayed jeans, but the retreat had forced him to ‘reassess his priorities’ – along with his dress sense, presumably . . .

If you were granted one wish, what would it be? I'm still trying to think of one that encompasses world peace, toned thighs, wealth, and good health forever, without coming across as incredibly greedy.

Comments

Congratulations on the launch of your new book, Karen - I like your humorous style! Have no idea what I'd wish for at the moment, apart from the obvious to do with weight and fitness, of course.
Karen said…
Thanks, Rosemary :o)
I must admit it would be hard to narrow everything down to one wish!
Wendy's Writing said…
Huge congratulations, Karen x
Karen said…
Many thanks, Wendy :o)
Sally Townsend said…
Congratulations on the launch of your book. I wish you every success !
Karen said…
Thank you very much, Sally :o)
Can't wait to see where this goes. I like the heroine already!

Many congratulations on being published too!
Amanda said…
CONGRATULATIONS, Karen - great chapter - great novel! Ooh, one wish is a tricky one! Can I wish for more wishes? X
Karen said…
Aw, thank you, Fiona :o)

Thanks, Amanda! Great idea to wish for more wishes :o)
DAB said…
Two Children - Poem by Spike Milligan
Two children (small), one Four, one Five,
Once saw a bee go in a hive,
They'd never seen a bee before!
So waited there to see some more.
And sure enough along they came
A dozen bees (and all the same!)
Within the hive they buzzed about;
Then, one by one, they all flew out.
Said Four: 'Those bees are silly things,
But how I wish I had their wings!'

I wish I had the ability to see the world again through the innocent eyes of a child, rather than that of a sarcastic middle aged women! ;-) I wish you all the best with your latest novel, Clarkey. Tommox
Karen said…
You and me both, Tommo :o) Good old Spike. That poem made me smile at least - much needed at the moment as we sadly had to have our beloved Molly-dog put down at the weekend, and I'm rather bereft at the moment. xx
Georgina Troy said…
I love the idea of this book and have it on my Kindle waiting to lose myself in it on holiday, can't wait!
Misha Gericke said…
Congrats on the book launch! I hope the book is doing well. :-)
Karen said…
Thanks, Georgina, I hope you enjoyed it :o)

Thank you, Misha!